More Random Thoughts

I will no longer be using the word love, unless it is directed at a person. The four letter word is a strong noun, adjective and verb and I want find a better way to articulate myself without the word love. (EG 1) "I really enjoy this song," in contrast to "I love this song" 2) "I think your necklace is beautiful" in contrast to "I love your necklace") But i can say, I love you mom. I love you, dad. Love you, brother. Love you, sisters. I love you, best friends. Love you. . .I want people to know that when I say it, I truly mean it :)

I have a deep appreciation for music (I would have once said: I love music) and I decided that I want to not only appreciate music, I want to create it. I think I might take up piano/keyboard.

Random Thoughts. . .

. . .random thoughts that I thought about sharing on facebook and twitter. . .but then decided to only share with you-whoever you are.

I am a high self monitor (See my social psychology blog . . .I'd paste the link, but I don't know how) and it gets me in 'trouble' in regards to likability among people my age.

Today I didn't get to see/hear the news till 10pm. I didn't find out about the UT Shooting until 10pm PST and the events happened at 8am CT. I didn't get to watch/hear the Brown/Whitman Debate. I didn't hear/see the deaths in Cuidad Jaurez and Mexcio in general. I can't decide if not knowing the news was a good or bad thing.

I am thankful

It has been a crumby day and week so far, in regards to work, physical/emotional feelings, and decisions made by the Senate; yet I have to be thankful and I want to take time out-at least for a minute-to say thank you.

Most importantly, thank you, Lord and Savior for giving me this day (as 'poopy' as it was). Thank you for waking me up (literally) as I drove home from a 10 hour day at work, when I was feet away from the car in front of me. Thank you for giving me good brakes on my car. Thank you for my car. Thank you letting me get to a gas station to fill up my gas tank. Thank you for providing me with a job that helped me earn money to pay for the gasoline I put in my car. Thank you for the iPod (and the generous friends, who gave me the iPod) that helps me make sense of my feelings and emotions, providing aiding and soothing sounds through an earphone as I drive. Thank you for my parents. Thank you allowing me to be born in the United States of America. Thank you for giving me the opportunity to attend the university of my choice and thank you for the lessons you taught me while I was away at school; the friends and sisters you provided me with, while I was at SU. Thank you for the food on my table and the gum in my purse. Thank you for the clean water in my nalgene bottle. Thank you for my colored pencils and my blue bic pens. Thank you for the Sally Hansen Diamond Strength nail hardener that is helping me kick my nail biting habit. Thank you.

Waitlisted

I just spent the last 2 hours closing and opening facebook on my browser as well as Southwestern's homepage. I miss school, I miss Southwestern and as a result, I spent the evening living vicariously through my student friends.

I will not miss school next week-because I will, hopefully, be taking four evening classes. I am waitlisted for all four classes unfortunately, a concept I do not understand because I went to Southwestern; a university in which, if I wanted to take a class, I simply registered for it. I was never waitlisted.

My potential classes are each three hours long, once a week.
Monday, 6:00-9:05pm: Fundamentals of Public Speaking (Wait #12 of 13).
Tuesday, 6:30-935pm: Human Lifespan Development (Wait#13 of 20).
Wednesday, 6:30-9:35pm: Introduction to Neuroscience (Wait #1 of 3).
Thursday 6:30-9:35pm: Cultural Anthropology (Wait#19 of 30).

Human Lifespan Development and Intro to Neuroscience are both psychology classes that I am taking for fun, in contrast, Cultural Anthropology and Fundamentals of Public Speaking are pre-reqs for a Master's program. . .a master's program in nursing. I think, as of right now, I will apply in the Fall of 2011 for a Master's in Nursing. Ideally, I want to find a dual Master's program, Nursing and Social Work, but I have had no luck finding said program. Does it exist? I also need Human Anatomy, Nutrition and a third English class for a Master's program, but Modesto Junior College did not offer these classes in the evening (I am working full time, 8-4:30, M-F and I have a 45 minute commute). If I do not get into Anthrophology and/or Fundamentals of Public Speaking, I'll be taking all five classes next semester at any and all of the junior colleges/universities in the 209 (MJC, Columbia, Delta, and CSU Stanislaus) Wish me luck!

- a hopeful, janet

I've quit

I have quit facebook and twitter. I have quit them both for at least the next week. I'm still discovering reasons to minimize the use of social networking, but I will say, its tough to quit cold turkey. I have a whole list of things that I want to accomplish with my free time, including but not limited to: snail mail (If you give me your address, I'll write!), scrapbooks (some of which are over a year overdue birthday/graduation presents), and establishing academic goals. I would also like to spend my free time making phone calls. Business phone calls as well as personal calls to friends and family. (I wish I had a bluetooth handsfree device to use while I drive).

The idea to quit facebook came to me Sunday night after I'd spent a good 45 minutes on Facebook. . .the next morning, my iPod played Ken Block's "We Don't Talk Anymore". . .I took the song as an affirmation to quit.

Used to lie awake
And talk away
Whatever things were hanging in the air
Spoke adventures and philosophies
Now the conversation's ended
Cause you can't stop flipping around

We got news at eleven
We got sinners selling Heaven
We got infomercial dramas
We got MTV
We spend hours now online
Anything to pass the time
All I know is that we never talk anymore
No

Used to walk around and talk about
War, religion, and people on the street
Critique the books we read
And the trials of our parents
And we'd scream through happy hour
Wondering where we were going to eat

We got news at eleven
We got sinners selling Heaven
We got infomercial dramas
We got MTV
We spend hours now online
Anything to pass the time
All I know is that we never talk anymore
No

Can't you see I'm looking backwards
My friend
I'm lonely here and I need somebody to talk to
Won't you listen
How you listened
When this all got started

Used to hug the phone and talk to sleep
And wake up with it warm against your soul
And I would fall asleep just listening to you breathing
Now you screen your machine
And you hug your remote control

We got news at eleven
Political parties into Heaven
We got infomercial dramas
We got MTV
We spend hours now online
Anything to pass the time
All I know is that we never talk anymore
No

We got news twenty four seven
We got Letterman, Jay and Conan
We got wealthy TV psychics
We got VH1
We spend hours now online
Even porn to pass the time
All I know is that we never talk anymore
No
We don't talk anymore
We don't talk anymore
We don't talk anymore


Its past my bed time. . .yes, my bed time is 10:30.

La Familia Del Real

La Familia Del Real y el alcohol

The beauty of my weekend with my family.

A note to myself, when I am missing my sisters and friends that I made in Texas:
-You love your family and being around for big, important family events (in contrast to being in Texas) is worth it

more to come.

Ignorance is Bliss

[This is a note to myself to think about April 2003 and the thoughts provoked sitting next to my brother, a three time Veteran, during a viewing of Green Zone]

I'm hoping, I'll think and then sort my thoughts on Blogspot. Maybe